Every time I walk outside, I see people doing stupid things. Things that are so dangerous, so blatantly stupid, that I am forced to ask myself "Am I going to have to try and save this retard's life?" Here's an example:

 

I'm talking to this guy and the topic somehow finds it's way to keeping food cold in the woods. He looks at me with a straight face and asks "Well couldn't you just throw some dry ice into the food barrel?" Yes, let's put a frozen gas into an airtight container, then strap it to our backs and walk in the sun for a few hours! Brilliant!

 

But me, being the forgiving soul that I am, gently explain why this would be a bad idea. Afterall, we can't all be chemists and physicists, can we? I explain to him the concepts of pressurized gases and asphyxiation and how pulling plastic shrapnel out of the back of your head might not be an ideal passtime. He seemed to understand.

 

But as is often the case with these stories, the worst is yet to come.

 

Another future Darwin Award candidate happens to overhear my warnings and actually has the balls to say "That's stupid. CO2 isn't flammable and there's no way you could suffocate yourself unless you stuck your head into the barrel". I kid you not, he actually said this with a straight face.

 

So in my most patronizing voice (and those of you who know me personally understand just how patronizing that is!) I kindly direct him to the NOAA dry ice safety page FOR KIDS. Sure, I could have directed him to the OSHA safety page, or the CCOHS, or about a thousand other sources, but that wouldn't have been nearly insulting and demeaning enough. If anyone is curious, here is the NOAA page in question. It's filled with such complicated material as:

 

And he actually had the nerve to tell me I was "being paranoid, and nobody has ever been hurt by something like this."

 

Well, thank goodness for Google Video!

 

Then if you can believe it, he CONTINUES arguing with me, saying "Oh well those food barrels are a lot stronger than a water bottle."

 

At this point, it's become obvious that he's too stupid to live, so I look at him and say "OK, you go right ahead and do it. Maybe you'll be lucky. Lots of people do stupid things every day of their lives, and never suffer the consequences." Then I turn to the first guy and say "If you value your life, I don't reccomend what this guy says." and I walked away.

 

Darwin's theory has a flaw in it. It's not the most successful variation that survives, it's the most prolific. Intelligent people of the world, this is your rallying cry! Go forth and multiply! The only hope for the human race is to outbreed the stupid people. And boy oh boy, do they ever have a head start.

Hooray! Oil prices are back down to around $50! SUV's for everyone!

 

Don't rush out and buy that H3 just yet folks. Let's examine the reason for this "correction".

 

All of the major investment houses, lead by Goldman and Sachs are pulling out of energy. Over the last 2 weeks, G&S has reduced it's energy weighting from 70% to 50%. But what on earth for? If oil is running out as fast as you say, shouldn't they be buying in?

 

Well here's the problem:

 

An oil contract is only valuable if there's a reasonable expectation that the commodity will actually be delivered. With the global trend toward nationalization and exclusive bilateral contracts accelerating, this is becoming a fairly uncertain thing. The oil majors (Exxon, BP, Shell and Total) are heavily dependant on their foriegn holdings for production. As countries around the world nationalize their oil industries, they sieze control of those in situ resources and remove them from the global market. Instead of selling it on the open market, most of these countries are opting to enter into long-term exclusive contracts with nations, often in exchange for advanced weapons technology. The oil majors can no longer garentee delivery over large numbers of their contracts. But it gets worse.

 

With the recent siezure of the Iranian consulate in Iraq by US forces, the addition of the Bataan, Stennis and Reagan strike groups to the region, embargos on Iranian banks and recent Israeli Air Force training missions to Gibraltar, it's beginning to look like an attack on Iran is a certainty. When that happens, Iran will retaliate with the only effective weapon it has: disrupting transit through the Strait of Hormuz.

 

If I were holding a large number of oil delivery contracts, I'd be selling them as fast as humanly possible.